I’m going to kill Xavier right after I get done mangling Sam. Christ on a bike! Who did I ass rape in a past life with a piece of rusty rebar to deserve this level of bullshit? Sam and his damn hero complex drag our fucked up little family into the middle of the ocean without life vest or med kits or anything else. Fucking really Charles? Super secret jet and you can’t keep basic medical supplies on board? Great idea. Let’s send them out to the middle of the ocean to save a bunch of helpless bastards. Let’s make the Ice Queen the leader for a mission because Mr. Weather Man is in bed “sick.” *Grow some fucking balls Logan. You could have taken care of the problem in five minutes but your too deep in your own fucking problems to come out and lead like you so wanted to. Which I could have forgiven were it not for the fact that without him Lidya almost got her damn face burnt off. That girl needs to learn not jump into fire when your ability is based on ice! Third-degree burns were not advertised in the admissions letter.
Despite all that though, I think this was exactly what
I we needed. We are all so fucked up. The rest of them are starting to understand their powers. I on the other hand have just been reminded that I am a huge slab of muscle. That apparently looks like a troll to an Icelander. There was a time, before That Day I would have jumped all over Arni for that comment. And especially for the using the larger showers in the basement comment. Who you calling big, little bitch? But now, now the more I live with it the more I feel like I am becoming more at peace with who and what I am. The more I change, the easier it is. And the fact that I do it to save my fucked up little family helps a lot.
But who am I kidding? Being a monster run in the family. I wonder at what point Mom was going to mention that her brother is famous scientist who happen to turn into a giant green rage monster. What the fuck is Xavier thinking putting us under the same roof? Dr. Banner, Uncle Banner? – No – seems nice enough. We have a lot in common it seems. Both of attempted suicide at some point. Haven’t thought of that in a long time. The feel of the wind going through my hair. The chain around my neck. My feet hitting the ground and the chain being slack after jumping out of that tree. The taste of Dad’s gun. And the horrible taste of burnt gun powder. There were a few other attempts not long after That Day, but when it became clear none were going to work I gave up. The look on that old lady’s face when she hit me with car was priceless though. I have to wonder though, why does he call it a “thing inside of us.” We are just mutants. I’ve never once anthropomorphised the change. It is just me. I am who I am. I wonder of Dr. Banner is different when he changes. Maybe something to do with the bomb that activated his mutant gene. Maybe it is just him taking the easy way out.
What isn’t easy is making friends. I fucking hate friends. They are just annoying and needy, and piss me off. And I couldn’t live without them. I don’t know how I made it these last several years alone. I know that it is best to be away from people. But I am a social animal. Lidya’s concern for my burns was kind of funny. I didn’t have the heart to tell her they would probably heal in a day. For a girl who doesn’t say much, and doesn’t seem to want to lead, she sure does a lot of it. And she gave a perfectly reasonable answer when I called her on it. At least the coffee is good. I still don’t know what her game is though.
On the other hand my olive branch to Sammy seems to have worked. I couldn’t care less about my hair beyond it being clean and not all over the place but I know Sammy is into the type of thing. It was funny saying she was going to need a stepladder to do it though. I think between her and Lidya I may actually have found close friends. I guess we’ll see. She cares too much though and that is going to get her in trouble. And Lidya and I are going to have to be there to help her out of it.